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dreams.

if you asked me, whether i'm okay with losing you? no, i'm not okay, it hurts.
i don't wannt you to leave. but what i'm aware of, is that you have to leave.
cause i know, you have a dream, and you're doing your best to make it come true.
i love you, more that i can tell, and more than i know.
but i don't want to be a barrier, between you, and your dream.
cause i don't want you to face regrets, of choosing me.
i can't stand it, to see you looked sad.
i always want you to be happy.
so, don't worry about me, just go, do what you have to do.
don't make any promises to me, i want you to be free.
i hope you'll get everything you have ever dream of.
and if one day, you still remember me,i will be more than greatful..

i watched a muvee, and i reminds me of how bad a decision one can make in love. i have. whenever i think i found sum1, i started to think, what if its not love, what if i think i like him because, he's always there, what if i actually love him and he is actually not, and it scared the hell out of me. What if what i feel makes him hurt me, what if he hurt me? What if he left me? What if he's gone or died? It would have been the end of me. So I cut it short, before he ever could. i ran away, fighting my own will as hard as i could, and you know what? It was the biggest mistake I ever made. i still misses him, i want to talk to him, but i cant. the things i did push him away from me, over and over again, unintentionally. So, for you ppl out there, you've got to risk love! I didn't and look at me. It doesn't mean that you're never going to get hurt but the pain you feel will never compare to the regret that comes from walking away from love. And from someone who's felt a lot of both trust me, pain beats regret each and everyday.  Don't run away. Just don't. When you feel like you've found someone special, someone that is close to your heart, take a shot. Who knows? things might be a whole lot better, biala malu pon, coz the feeling of ashamed or embarrassment or even rejected will fade away eventually, but not the regret. Dear friend, take care~...

N.

it's 3 in d morning, and I'm still up trying to focus in writing my report on fatty acids determinations. what is that..? ish ish ish...haha...tp tabole na focus pon..tgk la ni..melilau bwat blog plak..haha..

nk tau..? i gt new plans for my future..oredi told my umi..n as usual she told my abah..haha...but thats okay..haha...tiz is my newest future plan..ah...abah da bg greenlite utk keje cuti nih..ak ingt na apply la..klo ckop duet bole pg amek lesen scuba..haha...xpon jln2..mkn angin...tp..ckp, ckp jgk...ntah leh dpt ke x ak nih..al mklumla..first time na mntk keje..ntah2 interview pon tak lepas..haha..tp xpe...at least i tried..huhu..*hopes high mode evrybody~...* (^_^)v

N.